Gay Marriage: How should I respond?

I know; I’m a little late to the game. Every organization under the sun has already responded to the Supreme Court’s recent decision regarding gay marriage. I think some of them must have prepared their response ahead of time since they had their posts and comments up so quickly.

I like to process and analyze information. I’ve found my responses are better if I take time to prayerfully think things through.

So here goes…

Two Different Issues

We have blurred the lines in the current debate but it actually addresses two separate issues. The first one is a gay relationship and the resulting behavior between two individuals; the second issue is what many are calling gay marriage. Two issues require two different responses.

Gay Relationships

These types of relationships are sin. To deny that is a gross distortion of God’s Word. However, before you start yelling that in someone’s face, remember that all sexual relationships outside of a husband and wife are sin. Our society – even our church society – seems to forget that.

They are also no more sinful than lying to your boss, having a prideful and arrogant spirit, failing to trust God can take care of you, or being stingy with your time and resources. We can’t demonize gay relationships when we are so willing to overlook what we like to classify as “lesser” sins. They’re all the same because they all separate as from a personal relationship with God. And we’re all guilty of them. I encourage you to read Romans 3:19-26.

Some people like to say gay relationships aren’t sin because they’re listed in the Old Testament Law and that doesn’t apply today. Yes, we praise God for the life and death of Jesus who provided us with a New Covenant that no longer requires the sacrifice of animals in an ongoing inadequate attempt at being made right with God. However, the Law still defines sin for us (Romans 3:20). All those things listed in its pages are still sin. We now rely on Jesus’ sacrifice as the final and eternal atonement for our sin rather than the blood of animals that could never accomplish the job. I encourage you to read Hebrews 9:1-10:18.

Some people like to say gay relationships aren’t sin because Jesus never addressed them directly. Jesus is the Word made flesh, however. You can’t separate the “words in red” from the whole of Scripture. You can’t decide the words He spoke while on earth are truer than all the rest of the words from Genesis through Revelation. I encourage you to read John 1:1-18.

Gay Marriage

Gay marriage can’t exist. A civil union can but not a marriage. The state can recognize a civil union; both God and the state recognize a marriage. God will never recognize a marriage between two gay individuals. It has nothing to do with whether you think He should or what it means if He does or doesn’t. I base the rejection entirely on the fact that God said a marriage is between one man and one woman. Any variance outside of that is sin which takes us back to my earlier points. I encourage you to read Genesis 2:20-25.

I didn’t make the rules so I can’t change them. In fact, none of us did so none of us can change them. God made the rules and we don’t get to change them just because we don’t like them. We can choose not to follow them (again, sin) but we can’t change them.

So how do I respond to this change in our nation?

It was a sad day for me when the Supreme Court announced this decision. Others rejoiced. My sorrow and their joy have nothing to do with who’s right or what’s right. But we’ve already discussed that.

My initial response – like many who hold to the truth and authority of God’s Word – was the concern of a coming judgment on our nation. After all, our courts have decreed that God is wrong and they know what’s best. God doesn’t take too kindly to that kind of self-exaltation. I encourage you to read Isaiah 14:9-15 to see how that attitude worked out for Satan.

On the other hand, I realized, our courts decided it was ok to abort unborn children over forty years ago. It’s a similar situation where the Supreme Court decided they knew better than God as to the creation of human life. So far, our nation hasn’t seen a fire and brimstone response to that decision. We’re missing approximately 53 million of our citizens who would be my age and younger which is a reason to mourn. I know our nation would mourn them if they had died in a natural disaster or war. Yet, because we slaughtered them in the womb, we don’t mourn their absence. But I’m getting off the point which is that God hasn’t struck down our nation because of that Supreme Court decision.

Then I remembered a Bible verse. “And just as it is appointed for people to die once – and after this, judgment – so also the Messiah, having been offered once to bear the sins of many, will appear a second time, not to bear sin, but to bring salvation to those who are waiting for Him” (Hebrews 9:27-28).

Here’s the connection – God’s Word promises a judgment of death for those who sin. However, that judgment doesn’t come in the moment of our initial sin. For example, God doesn’t strike us dead the first time we lie to our parents as a child. Our sin guarantees the coming judgment but God withholds the judgment until a certain time when we die once because of sin. Ideally, in that intervening time, the offender will recognize their sin, seek God’s forgiveness and readily available grace, and accept Jesus as the source of salvation from the judgment for their sin. If the offender never seeks that forgiveness, then the judgment of death is certain.

I think this applies to our nation – and any nation – that exalts itself above God’s Word and authority. We sinned as a nation in 1973 when we decided it was ok to kill our unborn but judgment wasn’t swift and immediate. We sinned again as a nation last week when we decided homosexuality is ok and is included within the definition of marriage. We’ve probably sinned other times in our history but I’m focusing on these two here. God’s judgment of our nation may not be swift and immediate but it is certain unless, as a nation, we humble ourselves before God and seek His forgiveness. His grace is ready and waiting for our nation as much as it is for the individual. If we choose not to seek it, however, judgment awaits. I encourage you to read Psalm 9.

How should I live as Christian in this nation?

The Supreme Court’s decision didn’t change the answer to this question. We live the same way now as we should have been in the past.

We love our neighbors which has nothing to do with whether or not you agree with their sin of choice. After all, we all sin (Matthew 22:39).

We extend grace to those who sin because God has done the same thing for us (2 Corinthians 1:12).

We should show love and good works, come together in worship, and encourage one another (Hebrews 10:24-25).

We should act justly, love faithfulness, and walk humbly with God (Micah 6:8).

We should love our enemies and pray for those who persecute us (Matthew 5:44).

We should rejoice in persecution as we suffer as did Jesus, our Savior (John 15:20).

I could go on but the list would be extensive. None of it would include a call to hatred or condemnation on our part, however. I encourage you to read the New Testament.

Priorities: My Children aren't that Important

You probably think my title is an attention grabber to pique your curiosity. Sorry, that’s not the case. My kids really aren’t that important.

Let me explain before you skip the rest of the article to leave me a nasty comment. But before I explain, I want to share some of this year’s Mother’s Day moments.

Fourth Child

My youngest is a pure expression of creativity. Her unique views of the world never cease to amaze. Many people create acrostic poems for Mother’s Day – even the well-known Proverbs 31 passage is an acrostic! Leave it to my youngest, however, to make an acrostic based on the second letter of each word. Maybe I’m wrong, but I think that’s kind of impressive for her age.

Third Child

My younger middle child thrives on the beauty of musical order. She mixes structure with creativity and rhythm with emotion to bring music to life. She’s had a song in her heart since the day she was born. No wonder that she shared her feelings in poetry.

Second Child

My older middle child gets it – whatever “it” is. Her quick mind, sharp wit, and logical comprehension not only make her hysterically entertaining but also provide a deep understanding of situations. She was the first to find me Mother’s Day morning to share her love. Also no surprise that she was the one that turned to social media to further share her feelings. Yeah, I know, I need to work on my "duck face."

First Child

My firstborn and I have something I’ll never have with my other daughters. For her first years, it was her and I each day. She’s always been a daddy’s girl but we made many memories those first years before my second daughter joined us. Her independence level will soon take a final giant leap as she branches out into God’s plan for her life. However, we still remember those first days together; they influenced her gift this year.

My Korean Daughter

She’s been with us for two years and, God willing, she’ll be with us two more. She’s part of our family, though. She’s the one to take care of what needs done – how else could her grades average 100% for all classes while learning in a second language? No surprise, then, that she found time and opportunity to buy a card. She’s also as sweet as she is smart as you’d see if you read her message inside the card which began, “Dear My American Mom.”

How can I say they aren’t that important?

They’re amazing – beautiful, creative, intelligent, compassionate, expressive, and all the things we hope for in children. I love each of them to the moon and back.

But they aren’t the most important.

God is. I love Him more.

I’ve been seeing these cute little graphics on social media recently. They say things like,

• “Your children are the greatest gift God will give to you.”
• “Children aren’t a distraction from the most important thing. They are the most important thing.”
• “The most magical day of my life was the day I became a mom.”

They all seem pleasant and sweet on the surface but lies, failures, and disappointments hide in the details of each one.

Greatest Gift
My daughters are each a great gift, but they aren’t the greatest. My husband is a great gift, too. He ranks right up there with my girls. I won’t insult him by saying they are a better gift than he is. Even he’s not the greatest, though. Only one of God’s gifts is the greatest – that of His Son. That’s the only gift in my life that covers all my inadequacies, forgives all my mistakes, and keeps giving grace and love no matter what situations come.

Most Important
They are each so important. God created them unique to fulfill a role in His kingdom. I know He has an incredible plan for each of them – just like being their mom is part of His incredible plan for me. However, being Jimmy’s wife is also part of His plan for me and it’s every bit as important as them. Only God’s plan is the most important; I’m blessed that He chose to include them as part of that plan. His is the only plan that can meet the needs of a hurting world, bring salvation to the nations, and give us significance and importance through serving rather than exaltation.

Most Magical… or Amazing
God doesn’t work with magic, so let’s use the word “amazing” instead of “magical.” I think it still fits with the original intent. I clearly remember the moment each child lay in my arms for the first time. All four were absolutely amazing. They were incredible. But they weren’t the most amazing moments of my life. I remember standing at the front of a church, facing Jimmy as we promised our lives to each other. That was pretty amazing. I remember the moment each daughter accepted Jesus as her Savior. Those moments of spiritual birth were even more amazing than the ones of physical birth. My own personal moment of spiritual birth was amazing as well.

In fact, every time I consider God’s offer of grace and expression of sacrificial love through His Son, I experience the most amazing moment. I’m amazed that the Creator of the universe could love us so passionately that He couldn’t allow sin to separate us from Him. I’m amazed that God the Son lived in holy, perfect beauty with the Father and Spirit and yet chose to leave heaven to come to this dirt-clod we call earth. I’m amazed by His power that willingly laid down His own life and defeated death by resurrecting back to life. I’m amazed by His power to someday return to the Mount of Olives in Jerusalem with footsteps that will split the mountain in half. Jesus is the most amazing moment.

Finding Balance

I love my girls… they are a great gift, they’re important, and they’re amazing. However, only God is the greatest, most important, most amazing part of my life.

I base my identity on my position as a child of God, not on my position as someone’s mother. My success in life is loving and serving Him, not my ability to bear or raise children.

As women, we have seven different roles. We stay busy as wives, mothers, businesswomen, friends, servants, and homemakers. They’re all important but none of them is most important. Can we say an unmarried woman is less because being a wife isn’t part of her roles? Are women without children less because they’ve never birthed or raised a child? Are women who don’t engage in the workplace less because they don’t earn a paycheck? Are women with a messy home less because they don’t live in spotless perfection? Of course not!

Only the seventh role is the most important – our role as the beloved daughter of God Most High. It’s the umbrella that covers, protects, and sustains the other six. Then we can say, “Many women are capable, but you surpass them all! Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord will be praised” (Proverbs 31:29-30).


For more on finding balance and women's roles, please check out Seven Roles, One Woman: You Expect Me to do All That?

The Next Generation: Considering dad's role at Passover

Now, in the presence of loved ones and friends,
before us the emblems of festive rejoicing,
we gather for our sacred celebration.

With the household of Israel – our elders and young ones –
linking and bonding the past with the future,
we heed once again the divine call to service.

Living our story that is told for all peoples,
whose shining conclusion is yet to unfold,
we gather to observe the Passover.* 

My husband was recently asked to speak to a group of Baptist men on the role of the father during the Passover celebration. First, it’s exciting to see the growing desire among Protestant groups to understand our Jewish religious heritage. Yes, it’s not across the board. Some denominations continue to pull away from Israel and the Jewish people. However, many Christians are about to burst with love for this ancient people and their homeland. It’s as if they’ve discovered a brother or sister they never knew existed!

Jimmy and I have never approached Passover from this particular perspective. For us, Passover is all about Jesus the Messiah. Every element points toward Him, His sacrifice, and His imminent return. (See 1 Corinthians 5:7-8).

After some thought, research, and discussion, he put together some great points on the significance of the father’s role during the Passover season. Passover begins this Friday night at sunset; in honor of the upcoming festival, I’d like to share his thoughts with you.

What does Dad do?

Judaism and Christianity are similar in that the father is the spiritual leader of the home. One author uses Joseph, the earthly father of Jesus, as an example of a Jewish father and writes, “Although we know that Joseph was a craftsman, the primary responsibility of parents in his day was to train their children in the fundamentals of practical life and covenant relationship with God. The goal of the average Hebrew family man in the first century was not the acquisition of great wealth or the achievement of power. It was to live a life of covenant faithfulness to the Lord and teach his family to do the same” (Source).

God calls both Jewish and Christian fathers to lead and teach in the home. How do we see this in the celebration of Passover?

Prepare the Home
A Jewish home must be cleansed of all leaven, or yeast, prior to the celebration. The family removes all bread and bread products. On the evening before the first night of Passover, the father leads the family in a search through the entire home to make sure they have removed all leaven.

In Scripture, leaven represents sin. The unleavened bread of Passover points to Jesus the Messiah, the bread of life who knew no sin. Only He has lived a life entirely free from the corruption of sin, just as the unleavened bread is free from the corruption of yeast.

The father leads the family in removing leaven from the home. Likewise, fathers need to lead in removing sin from the life of the family. This world eagerly and slyly tries to penetrate our homes and families with corruptive influences. A myriad of electronic options, the influence of others, and false teaching would all love to bring destruction into our homes. It’s primarily the father’s responsibility to vigilantly guard and protect his home from their influence. He’s also quick to remove it when it does appear.

Prepare the Lamb
Jews don’t sacrifice a lamb on Passover anymore. However, God’s original design required them to do so. The father brought the lamb into the home three days prior to Passover. He then led the family in inspecting the lamb to make sure it was free from blemish or defect. In short, the lamb had to be perfect.

The lamb of Passover also points us to Jesus. “For Christ, our Passover Lamb, has been sacrificed” (1 Corinthians 5:7 NIV). And later, “For you know that you were redeemed from your empty way of life inherited from the fathers, not with perishable things like silver or gold, but with the precious blood of Christ, like that of a lamb without defect or blemish” (1 Peter 1:18-19).

The father brings the lamb into the home. Likewise, the father should bring the Lamb of God into the home. Mom may teach the kids a lot of biblical lessons but dad has the responsibility to make sure the lessons are taught and the kids are learning. Of course, it’s still up to the child to respond and accept Jesus.

Blessing and Prayer
A Jewish Seder celebration contains many blessings – the four cups, the bitter herbs, the bread, the haroseth, and more all receive many blessings from the father throughout the meal. The light of the candles is the only exception. The mother recites the blessing at that time.

The blessings of Passover point to Christ as they acknowledge Him as our Provider, Lord, and Creator. The blessings point to Him as our Sustainer, the Giver of the law, the Redeemer of mankind, and the Savior whose return we await.

The father leads the family in blessing which plays a crucial role in the growth of a child. Think of how some of these ancient blessings have changed our modern day world… God’s promise to bless those who bless Israel, the blessing Melchizedek gave Abraham, the blessing Isaac gave Jacob instead of Esau, God’s blessing for Jacob when He changed His name to Israel, and Jacob’s blessing for Ephraim and Manasseh. And all these blessings are within only a few generations!

Pass it on to the next generation
The Jewish people thrive despite millennia of persecution. Primarily this is because of God’s plan and calling. Secondary, though, is the Jewish people’s commitment to teach the next generation which is an integral part of Passover each year. In my haggadah (book to guide through the Passover), right below the title, in a place of prominence, it reads, “As it is said: You shall tell your child on that day.”*

At each Passover celebration, the youngest asks the father a series of questions starting with, “How is this night different than other nights?” The father uses that opportunity to teach his child, and the rest of the family, the story of their deliverance from slavery in Egypt. For that reason, Passover has become the oldest continually celebrated holiday in the world. If we don’t teach our children, then the stories are lost forever.

The story of the Exodus points to Christ as He is the One who brought us out from the world, freed us from slavery, redeemed us, and waits to take us as His people and be our God.

The father teaches the next generation. Without his regular and continuous teaching, the child will grow without hearing the stories of redemption and salvation. Eventually, his family line will forget the power of God’s working and the necessity of Him in our lives. “Hear this, you elders, listen, all you inhabitants of the land. Has anything like this ever happened in your days or in the days of your ancestors? Tell your children about it, and let your children tell their children, and their children the next generation” (Joel 1:2-3).

 

*Taken from "A Passover Haggadah" as prepared by the Central Conference of American Rabbis, © 1982

Love and Serve God: Learning to pray for our children

I guess I’m a bad mom. I don’t know but it seems that’s what the world would have me believe.

I’ve encountered a few situations lately where people have expressed surprise verging on disapproval with my parenting style. I need to make more of my daughters’ decisions for them. I need to control every aspect of each situation they enter. I need to manipulate outcomes to guarantee my girls’ success. I need to map out every moment of their time and their future so they’ll have an amazingly successful career.

I think this is the problem – when Jimmy and I left the hospital after the birth of our first child, I forgot to pick up my pair of hovering helicopter wings on the way out.

Here’s what did happen in my life around that time, though. In early 1998, I found out I was pregnant with our first child. At that time, I read the Bible and prayed at our kitchen table each morning. From the time of that first positive pregnancy test, my prayer life added a new dimension.

I began to pray for each of my children to love and serve God. That was it. I wanted God to be real in their lives and I wanted help for Jimmy and me to raise them that way. God was real to each of us; the only way we could fail as parents was if we neglected to pass that along to them.

I’ve learned some things about what it means to love and serve God in the past 17 years since that first prayer. If we’re all still around 17 years from now, I’ll have some more things to share because I’m still learning. Also, I think these things apply to all of our relationships – not just how we relate to our children.

To love and serve God

God made you special and He loves you very much

This line actually came from Veggietales, a children’s video series who enjoyed their highest popularity in my daughters’ younger years.

The point for us, however, wasn’t only to teach the girls that God feels this way about them. Even more, we wanted them to learn God feels this way about everyone. Every person has a unique, inherent value because God made them. We don’t classify by race, age, gender, or any of the other categorizations where people like to set one group apart as superior to another group.

Some of the stories I remember that weren’t an issue because of the way my girls’ thought… A fourth grader can play with a third grader even though they aren’t the same age. It’s ok if you’re white but you want to pick out a black baby doll or if you think a black boy is cute. A new kid on the softball team needs help learning how to play – why would someone make fun of them?

We can’t love and serve God – as adults or children – if we don’t recognize this. We put people down because of how much money they have, how hard they work, where they live, how their family behaves, and other nonsense. As long as we do this, we’ll fail to see that God loves and serves each and every human on the planet and calls us to do the same.

Learn to learn

This is my primary goal in choosing to homeschool our daughters but it applies in all aspects of life.

God created an amazing environment for us to live in – it abounds in artistic creation and scientific discovery. It’s full of ideas, truth, art, and logic that all weave together to make the human experience. If our life’s goal is to learn information to pass a test to make a grade to get into a school to get a certain job, then I can almost guarantee we’ll miss out on the beauty of the artistry and the wonder of the science.

At some point we decide we can stop learning; for some, it’s after high school or college graduation. Others wait until they have a graduate or doctoral degree before they stop learning.

Loving and serving God, however, is to realize that we can never stop learning. As children, we can learn to learn so our life may become a pursuit of God’s truth, a discussion of ideas to implement it into the world, an ability to create as He created, and a capacity to research and discover all of it.

Grown up in a grown up body

Children are born with three parts – a body that interacts with its environment, a mind that interacts with other people, and a soul that interacts with God. As parents, we need to raise all three parts to adulthood.

Decent nutrition and shelter will help the physical body grow to adulthood all on its own. The mental functions of the mind aren’t so easy though. The spiritual soul is even more difficult but for now, I’m going to focus on the mind.

We had a 9 year old friend of my daughters over recently. We were going to buy Subway sandwiches for lunch so I asked her what she liked. She didn’t know; she said her mom always orders for her. I asked, “What kinds of meat do you like – ham, turkey, beef, or salami?” She didn’t know what any of the meats were because she’d never had to make a decision for her own sandwich.

Many adults are children in grown up bodies. It’s important for children to make their own decisions. They start young in deciding which clothes to wear or which lunchbox to buy. They learn skills that help them as they grow and their decisions become more complicated… Should I cheat on this test? Should I go out with this guy? Which car should I buy? What classes should I take? Where should I go to college? Should I marry this girl? Should I serve God on the mission field?

This isn’t only about decision making though.

My daughter wanted banana cut up on her Rice Krispies this morning. I’ve been teaching her how to use the knife and cut it herself but she told me she doesn’t like to get her hands slimy from cutting it. My answer was simple, “Yes, but when you’re 35, I’m not going to come over every morning to cut up your banana so your hands don’t get slimy.” She smiled and proceeded to cut her own banana.

We can’t make all their decisions for them; likewise, we can’t do everything for them. We often do because we do it better, faster, or safer. From cutting bananas to balancing their own checking account, they’ll never learn if we don’t allow them to try. Yes, they’ll mess up along the way. Sometimes we learn more from our failures and mistakes than we do our successes!

Part of loving and serving God is to function as responsible members of society. We make decisions and accept the responsibility for the outcome of those decisions as we also seek God’s guidance in the process. We accept our failures as learning opportunities for greater success in the future.

So what’s my point?

I don’t know; goodness knows I don’t have all the answers when it comes to parenting. I guess I’m only wanting to explain my lack of hovering helicopter wings. I want to raise children who recognize the value in all people. I want my children to try and serve those people rather than expect to be served. I want them to learn how to learn about what fascinates them and praise the God who created whatever interests them most. I want them to be responsible adults who can help society rather than drain it. I want them to love and serve God.

Generations: Valuing the legacy of a godly heritage

December may be the month we celebrate Jesus’ birth, but apparently it’s also the month of death.

The passing of four people in my life have warranted mention on my blog – all of them died during the month of December. Perhaps the glow of Christmas lights on homes and trees paled in comparison to the opportunity to experience the enveloping and penetrating light of the glory of God. Perhaps heartfelt tender Christmas carols dulled when given the chance to hear the angelic choir of heaven. I’ve shared the passing of all four with you because each one had a profound spiritual impact not only on my life but on the lives of hundreds around them.

Each one had a story – a reason for which I shared their life with you. For one, her life was a testament to Christ’s power in breaking us free from the confusion of abuse. For another, his story reminded us that the hope of heaven reunites us with loved ones. The third revealed lessons learned from one who lived life serving God.

Yesterday I attended the funeral of Jimmy’s granddad.

None of us are born holy; Granddad was no exception. In fact, quite a few of life’s years passed by for Granddad before the message of God’s salvation started to pierce his soul and transform his life. Somewhere, someone reached out to him as a young man and shared the message of hope.

 

Granddad later became a preacher himself; I would venture to guess that his fifty years behind the pulpit have changed thousands of lives. But even that isn’t the impact I want to share with you.

As I’m spending time with Jimmy and his family, I see a different kind of lasting impact – the impact of a godly heritage. It may not extend far but it runs deep. Granddad was already married when he humbled himself before God to receive forgiveness for his sins. He and Granny would have raised a family, worked their jobs, and lived their lives even if Granddad had never accepted Christ. It would have looked different but they would have made it happen.

But Granddad’s life changed when he accepted Christ. He studied God’s Word so he knew its message and power for his life. He shared God’s Word so others may know that same message and power. He prayed God’s Word because he knew therein is our power.

He studied for, shared with, and prayed for his children. His influence led them to accept Christ as their Savior. The transformation of this one man spread to the lives of his two children.

It led his children to find godly spouses when they grew up and create Christian homes of their own. Within time, four grandchildren were born and raised in godly homes. What was one became two and then doubled to four.

God decided one of the granddaughters could come to heaven early; her short life ended in her teens. Even in the midst of such a painful tragedy, however, the message of the gospel promised the hope of resurrection and eternal life for the young girl. Salvation was already a truth in her life, despite her young years.

The remaining grandchildren grew to adulthood, married Christian spouses, and started families of their own. One man’s influence became two, which doubled to four, and now has grown to ten great-grandchildren. All ten greats (as Granddad always called them), are being raised in three different godly homes where they also are hearing the message of salvation and the importance of a life transformed in service to God. One by one they are responding to that message. While some are still babies and toddlers, almost all of them have claimed the name of Christ and accepted His salvation in their own lives.

My oldest daughter was the first of that generation. Granny and Granddad drove halfway across the country to visit her when she was only a few weeks old. He held her in his arms and spoke that he never expected her to remember him. He thought God would call him home before she would form any memories. Yet, God blessed him with a long life. That same great-granddaughter is now 16. She wrote on her Facebook wall when she learned of his death, "Today my Great Granddad got to go to heaven. He was the one person who no matter how he felt would always have something to say about God's grace and how much he loved his family. Though I don't have many memories with him, because of long distances, I can't wait to make some with him in heaven. Have fun Great Granddaddy. Love you!"

If Christ waits a few more years before His return, who knows what might happen from those ten greats. Will they all accept Christ? Will they begin ten different Christian families of their own? What impact will they leave on the world? How will God answer the powerful prayers of the Great-Granddad who left a legacy of a Godly heritage for them?

In our instant society, we want to see results now. We want to see broad impact. But let us not forget, we do some of the most important ministry in the home to an audience of our children.

"Know that Yahweh your God is God, the faithful God who keeps His gracious covenant loyalty for a thousand generations with those who love Him and keep His commands” (Deuteronomy 7:9).

Immanuel: All He ever wanted was to be God with us

Christmas isn’t about Santa, $5 gift exchanges at endless holiday parties, and elaborate trays of special cookies and candies.

I think we all know that.

Christmas isn’t about family either, though. It’s isn’t the blessing of being together with loved ones. It’s not a child’s eyes as she bursts into the living room on Christmas morning. It’s not dinner around the table with aunts, uncles, cousins, and grandparents.

I’m not sure we all know that, though.

Perhaps that’s why the holidays disappoint for many year after year. We dread that one relative that will point out everything wrong in our family relationships. We stress over the one child who eagerly tears open the gift only to be upset he didn’t get what he wanted. We worry the table may not look like the pictures on Pinterest. We remember the family members who aren’t with us as bitterness and unforgiveness have pulled us apart.

We invest a lot of time, money, and energy trying to find fulfillment in areas that can’t fulfill. We place expectations on people and situations that can’t live up to them.

So What’s the Point?

Enjoy the blessings of Christmas – the joy of giving, the comfort of a special meal, the connection of beloved family members. You can enjoy these moments when you don’t enter the holiday expecting them to fulfill your dreams of a magical holiday.

We find the joy, the comfort, the connection, and the abundance of blessings when we focus first on Christmas as seen in one biblical word – Immanuel.

 

Immanuel

It’s a Hebrew word only used a few times in the whole Bible. God inspired Isaiah to call the awaited Messiah by the name Immanuel. Later, Matthew confirmed the fulfillment of the prophecy in his gospel when he wrote of Mary’s baby, Jesus. Matthew wrote, “Now all this took place to fulfill what was spoken by the Lord through the prophet: See, the virgin will become pregnant and give birth to a son, and they will name Him Immanuel” (Matthew 1:22-23).

Immanuel; it translates to English as “God with us.” Hebrew is a pictorial language so sometimes we can see another level of significance in the letter pictures the ancient Hebrews used to form the words. This one has given me reason to sit and reflect as I write this article. The Hebrew shows pictures of a God who experienced chaos, life, and nails. Wow.

You see, God was in heaven enjoying the glory of ultimate, sinless beauty and perfection. Yet, He chose to leave that place of divine triune intimacy and experience the chaos of a world thrown out of whack by sin. He chose to experience life. The experience of life meant He would also experience death because of the permeation of that same sin corruption. He chose to experience the nails pierced through His hands and feet because of the condemnation of sin. He chose to be God with us in the midst of all of our chaos, sin, pain, life, and death.

God with us

That had been the plan all along, though. In the beginning, the plan of God with us didn’t include the chaos, death, and nails brought in by sin. In the beginning, He was God with us in a perfect garden free from the destruction of sin. It was there that God walked with Adam and Eve as they experienced relationship together. However, what was a place of peaceful interaction became a place of fear and hiding as Adam and Eve chose the pleasure of a sinful moment (Genesis 3:8). From the beginning, God desired to be God with us. We blew it.

So God inspired Isaiah to write that the Son of the virgin would be Immanuel. That way He could be God with us once again. Even if being God with us meant joining us in our own chaotic mess of life to experience the nails.

He became God with us in our mess to restore the peaceful interaction of our former garden relationship; to create the opportunity for that relationship once again in the glory of eternity. He became God with us to experience our chaos so that one day we will experience “God’s dwelling is with humanity, and He will live with them. They will be His people, and God Himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe away every tear from their eyes. Death will no longer exist; grief, crying, and pain will exist no longer, because the previous things have passed away” (Revelation 21:3-4).

God experienced the chaos, life, and death of the nails so that we wouldn’t have too. He experienced them so that He might remove them from our lives and someday wipe away our tears, grief, and pain. He became God with us so He could be the fulfillment of all our hopes and expectations.

“The Word became flesh and took up residence among us. We observed His glory, the glory as the One and Only Son from the Father, full of grace and truth” (John 1:14).

Choose to Enjoy Life

"Every time you make a choice you are turning the central part of you, the part of you that chooses .... into something a little different from what it was before." -C.S. Lewis

We’re right in the middle of a Busy Life series.

• We glorify being busy.
• We have to make choices, not excuses.
• We have to choose not to stress.

After we stop glorifying our busy schedules and making excuses for how busy we are, we begin to see our choices. We make a choice to not let stress rule in our life; not let it control us.

We make a choice to enjoy life.

“So I commend the enjoyment of life, because there is nothing better for a person under the sun than to eat and drink and be glad. Then joy will accompany them in their toil all the days of the life God has given them under the sun” (Ecclesiastes 8:15).

In the midst of a chapter on

• obeying the government, even when we don’t want to
• our lack of control over the day of our death
• people are going to do bad things
• bad things happen to good people and good things happen to bad people

In the midst of this ancient list of modern-day problems, the wisest man who ever lived wrote, “So I commend the enjoyment of life.”

Life is hard. Bad stuff is going to happen. We can’t control every situation. We can’t manipulate away every negative outcome.

But, we can choose not to gripe. We can choose to work hard in whatever area God has called us and gifted us. We can choose to enjoy that work. We can choose to trust God. We can choose to recognize He is in control. We can choose to find joy.

Be sure to check back soon. We’re going to look at a couple more choices we can make

• Choose to Serve God
• Choose to Glorify God

Stronger than You Know: Utilizing your power in Christ

“Mom, can you open this for me?”

My oldest daughter asked me to pry the lid off a to-go style cup while she did dishes one night. At fourteen years old, she’s taller than me. She may be stronger than me – at least I know she can whack a softball further into the outfield than me. I know she can do twelve full push-ups whereas I max out at five.

I instinctively opened the cup for her without even thinking about it. Afterward though – as I stood beside her at the sink, thinking about how grown up she has become – I thought, “She didn't even try to open it. She assumed she couldn’t do it because she’s never been able to do so in the past. She doesn't realize that she's grown.”

We do the same thing in our Christian growth. We still think we're young – weak – even though God has given us more strength than we know. If we don't ever try something new then we never know the strength given to us. We never realize what we are capable of.

Let me share one of my favorite Bible passages with you; in fact, it is one of three foundational passages for my book, “Everything We Need: God's Path to Know Him Better.” It’s not one I can pull out a little bit to make a point – I have to do the whole thing every time I share it.

“I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in his holy people, and his incomparably great power for us who believe” (Ephesians 1:17-19).  

Paul prays for us to know three things – our hope in Christ, our eternal awaiting inheritance, and His power for us who believe. Did you catch that third one? Paul, because he had experienced it himself, wanted all of us to know God’s incomparably great power for us who believe. He continues by describing that power…

“That power is the same as the mighty strength he exerted when he raised Christ from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every name that is invoked, not only in the present age but also in the one to come” (Ephesians 1:19-21).

My daughter has the strength to remove the lid; she just didn’t use it. She didn’t try. She assumed she couldn’t because she had never been able to in the past. But at some point she had grown enough that she can now remove the lid.

If we don’t ever try anything new in our walk with Christ then we will never know our capabilities.

If we don't ever try anything new, we will never see His mighty power work through us to accomplish something we never thought possible.

Can you “pry off your own lid?” Can you step out in Christ’s power and do something new? Go on a mission trip, teach a class, sing a worship song, serve at a shelter, give a few dollars. Maybe you’ve been growing and can do something you never thought possible!

Everything We Need: Trusting in God's provision

Our family visited Branson, MO, this summer for vacation. Before we left, we went shopping. We went to Kohl's and Old Navy to buy swimming suits and flip-flops. We went to the grocery store to buy snacks and drinks for the road trip and late night munchies in the hotel. We went to Target for small bottles of shampoo.

By the time vacation started, we had... everything we needed.

School starts today. The last couple of weeks have been full of many more shopping trips. Old Navy again – this time for school clothes. Target for notebooks, pencils, protractors, rulers, and the list goes on. Famous Footwear for new shoes.

All this prepping – hopefully when I pick up the girls at school, they will tell me they had... everything they need.

God also provides everything we need for life. Seem impossible? He promised to do so in His Word...

God gives us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of Him.

Or, our knowledge of Him gives us everything we need to grow in our relationship with Him.

As a family, we would have been crazy to do all the shopping and work to get ready for vacation and then not go. We wouldn't sit in our house for a week – looking at the suitcases packed with new swimsuits and flip-flops beside a cooler packed with road trip treats.

We wouldn't take time out of the last days of summer to shop for school supplies if my girls didn't intend to start school. Who would waste time and money on these things when we could be doing a lot more fun stuff?

We did the work so we would have everything we needed. Then we could better enjoy our vacation and my girls will enjoy school more.

It's the same way with getting to know God. We do the work and then better enjoy the experience of having a relationship with Him – better enjoy serving Him – as He gives us everything we need for life and godliness.

To learn more about all of this, I encourage you to check out my book, Everything We Need: God's Path to Know Him Better. 

Bible Band-aids

This article is a follow up to last week's Band-aid Application. 

As a little girl, many nights I lay in bed afraid of what might lurk in the shadows - the monster under the bed, the vampire in the closet, the snake between the bed and the wall. Of course, all were figments of my imagination but even imaginary fears can paralyze.

One night, I remember my mom came to my room and found me afraid. She told me about a Bible verse that says, "What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee." She couldn't remember the reference but I found it later as an adult; it's Psalm 56:3. And yes, I learned it in the King James Version, complete with “thee” at the end.

She suggested as I lay in bed afraid, I repeat that simple verse until I fell asleep. I tried it; it worked. That became my routine every night I lay there in fear. I'd repeat "What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee" until my fears were comforted. Honestly, I still use it today and it still works, even though my fears are no longer monsters and vampires. I am still afraid of snakes but not that they hide between my bed and the wall.

Continuing with the Band-aid thought from last week –

That verse, “What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee,” became a Band-aid I could apply when my fear paralyzed me. The Bible is full of similar band-aids!

When I’m weak,

When my thoughts lead me astray,

When I don’t feel safe,

When I grow tired of writing, studying, and serving,

When I lose sight of my priorities,

When I have a hard time loving someone,

As I said earlier, the Bible is full of these Band-aids. Here’s the thing though – they don’t do any good if we don’t apply them! If we apply God’s Word, it miraculously heals our hurts, insecurities, doubts, and fears.

What is your favorite Band-aid – your favorite Bible verse? In what situations do you apply it?

Spark: Five ways to renew the light within you

An interesting thing swept through social media as the new year began earlier this month. All of a sudden, everyone was posting their new word for this upcoming year and asking others what is their word. People selected words like

All of these are good words; probably everyone has a story behind it. I didn’t choose one; I mean, so many good words are out there. I’m a thinker and a writer – how could I choose just one?

I realized a few days ago that I do actually have a favorite word, though. And, I realized that although I love this word for silly reasons, maybe God could teach me something through it.

I love this word because I love puzzles and word games. Every time I see this word, my mind starts playing games with it – it’s such a fun word! At least it is for a word geek like me. I love it because, even though it’s only five letters long, I can make so many words out of it without even rearranging the letters.

We all have a spark within us. God granted us life – even abundant life! He gave us an inner passion to connect with Him through His Son Jesus and shine His light to a dark world. Sometimes that spark runs down, though, and doesn’t burn so bright. Sometimes we have to rekindle our spark. There, buried in the word itself, are some ways we can do that.

Spa… Relax… Quiet. It doesn’t have to be at a spa but we need to take time to get away from the stress. We need to relax and be quiet. We need to refresh and rejuvenate ourselves.

Pa… Ma… Family. We need to build relationships with our biological and spiritual families. God places these people in our lives for a reason. We need to encourage each other, pray for one another, and love and support one another. The prayers and counsel of our families can bring us through many of the world’s trials.

Par... Golf... Sports... Exercise. Maybe you enjoy a round on the golf course and maybe not, but either way, physical exercise can do amazing things to relieve our stress and energize us spiritually.

Park… Outside... Nature. Get outside, enjoy the beauty of God’s creation, breath some fresh air. Look at the grandeur and majesty around you and remember that God created it. If He can care for all of that, then trust that He can care for you. Also, God values you more than He does all of the earth.

Ark… Noah… Bible. Nothing energizes us like spending time in God’s Word. Pick a verse or even a whole chapter. Read it; think about what God says in that passage. Think about how it can change your life if you let it. Then do it. Believe it and apply it and let yourself be transformed by it.

So there you have it – my little word geek moment. But the thing is, God can use anything to teach us a lesson. Now every time I see the word SPARK I’m going to be reminded to take time to rejuvenate myself so God’s spark – His light – can shine through me more effectively.

"For God, who said, 'Let light shine out of darkness,'
made his light shine in our hearts
to give us the light of the knowledge
of the glory of God in the face of Christ."
2 Corinthians 4:6