Thursday, May 14, 2015

Priorities: My Children aren't that Important

You probably think my title is an attention grabber to pique your curiosity. Sorry, that’s not the case. My kids really aren’t that important.

Let me explain before you skip the rest of the article to leave me a nasty comment. But before I explain, I want to share some of this year’s Mother’s Day moments.

Fourth Child

My youngest is a pure expression of creativity. Her unique views of the world never cease to amaze. Many people create acrostic poems for Mother’s Day – even the well-known Proverbs 31 passage is an acrostic! Leave it to my youngest, however, to make an acrostic based on the second letter of each word. Maybe I’m wrong, but I think that’s kind of impressive for her age.

Third Child

My younger middle child thrives on the beauty of musical order. She mixes structure with creativity and rhythm with emotion to bring music to life. She’s had a song in her heart since the day she was born. No wonder that she shared her feelings in poetry.

Second Child

My older middle child gets it – whatever “it” is. Her quick mind, sharp wit, and logical comprehension not only make her hysterically entertaining but also provide a deep understanding of situations. She was the first to find me Mother’s Day morning to share her love. Also no surprise that she was the one that turned to social media to further share her feelings. Yeah, I know, I need to work on my "duck face."

First Child

My firstborn and I have something I’ll never have with my other daughters. For her first years, it was her and I each day. She’s always been a daddy’s girl but we made many memories those first years before my second daughter joined us. Her independence level will soon take a final giant leap as she branches out into God’s plan for her life. However, we still remember those first days together; they influenced her gift this year.

My Korean Daughter

She’s been with us for two years and, God willing, she’ll be with us two more. She’s part of our family, though. She’s the one to take care of what needs done – how else could her grades average 100% for all classes while learning in a second language? No surprise, then, that she found time and opportunity to buy a card. She’s also as sweet as she is smart as you’d see if you read her message inside the card which began, “Dear My American Mom.”

How can I say they aren’t that important?

They’re amazing – beautiful, creative, intelligent, compassionate, expressive, and all the things we hope for in children. I love each of them to the moon and back.

But they aren’t the most important.

God is. I love Him more.

I’ve been seeing these cute little graphics on social media recently. They say things like,
  • “Your children are the greatest gift God will give to you.”
  • “Children aren’t a distraction from the most important thing. They are the most important thing.”
  • “The most magical day of my life was the day I became a mom.”
They all seem pleasant and sweet on the surface but lies, failures, and disappointments hide in the details of each one.

Greatest Gift
My daughters are each a great gift, but they aren’t the greatest. My husband is a great gift, too. He ranks right up there with my girls. I won’t insult him by saying they are a better gift than he is. Even he’s not the greatest, though. Only one of God’s gifts is the greatest – that of His Son. That’s the only gift in my life that covers all my inadequacies, forgives all my mistakes, and keeps giving grace and love no matter what situations come.

Most Important
They are each so important. God created them unique to fulfill a role in His kingdom. I know He has an incredible plan for each of them – just like being their mom is part of His incredible plan for me. However, being Jimmy’s wife is also part of His plan for me and it’s every bit as important as them. Only God’s plan is the most important; I’m blessed that He chose to include them as part of that plan. His is the only plan that can meet the needs of a hurting world, bring salvation to the nations, and give us significance and importance through serving rather than exaltation.

Most Magical… or Amazing
God doesn’t work with magic, so let’s use the word “amazing” instead of “magical.” I think it still fits with the original intent. I clearly remember the moment each child lay in my arms for the first time. All four were absolutely amazing. They were incredible. But they weren’t the most amazing moments of my life. I remember standing at the front of a church, facing Jimmy as we promised our lives to each other. That was pretty amazing. I remember the moment each daughter accepted Jesus as her Savior. Those moments of spiritual birth were even more amazing than the ones of physical birth. My own personal moment of spiritual birth was amazing as well.

In fact, every time I consider God’s offer of grace and expression of sacrificial love through His Son, I experience the most amazing moment. I’m amazed that the Creator of the universe could love us so passionately that He couldn’t allow sin to separate us from Him. I’m amazed that God the Son lived in holy, perfect beauty with the Father and Spirit and yet chose to leave heaven to come to this dirt-clod we call earth. I’m amazed by His power that willingly laid down His own life and defeated death by resurrecting back to life. I’m amazed by His power to someday return to the Mount of Olives in Jerusalem with footsteps that will split the mountain in half. Jesus is the most amazing moment.

Finding Balance

I love my girls… they are a great gift, they’re important, and they’re amazing. However, only God is the greatest, most important, most amazing part of my life.

I base my identity on my position as a child of God, not on my position as someone’s mother. My success in life is loving and serving Him, not my ability to bear or raise children.

As women, we have seven different roles. We stay busy as wives, mothers, businesswomen, friends, servants, and homemakers. They’re all important but none of them is most important. Can we say an unmarried woman is less because being a wife isn’t part of her roles? Are women without children less because they’ve never birthed or raised a child? Are women who don’t engage in the workplace less because they don’t earn a paycheck? Are women with a messy home less because they don’t live in spotless perfection? Of course not!

Only the seventh role is the most important – our role as the beloved daughter of God Most High. It’s the umbrella that covers, protects, and sustains the other six. Then we can say, “Many women are capable, but you surpass them all! Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord will be praised” (Proverbs 31:29-30).

For more on finding balance and women's roles, please check out Seven Roles, One Woman: You Expect Me to do All That?

No comments:

Post a Comment